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Old 05-01-2007, 02:25 AM   #1
 
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Talking some jokes

HERE ARE SOME JOKES MAY U LISTEN BEFORE


Ek Raat Light Jaane Ke baad.
Santa : Jaldi se Fan Chalo.
Banta : Fan on Karenge to candle nahin bhuj jayegi.........!

---------------------

Santa dials a number, A girl recieves the call
santa: who r u?
girl: sita
santa: maine to chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to

yeh to ayodhya mil gaya.

------------

Santa ko truck ne takkar mar di.

Banta- yaar jo hona tha ho gaya par tu itna dara hua kyo hai?
Santa- yaar kyonki us truck ke peeche likha tha "phir Milenge"!!!!

-------------
Ek truck doosre truck ko kheench raha tha, Dekh kar santa haskar lotpot hoke gir pada aur bola:

EK rassi ka tukda uthane ke liye 2-2 truck.....

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ek Sardar ped(tree) par chada, to upar baithe bandar ne poocha: TU KYU CHADA?
Sardar: Apple khane
Bandar: par ye to mango tree hai
Sardar pata hai apple saath laya hu....

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1 SARDAR...AAj maine paani ko ullu banaya.
2nd...Wo kaise..?
1st...Aaaj maine nahane ke liye paani garam kiya aur thande se naha liya...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Banta : Oye to har SMS ko do baar kyom bhej raha hai ?
Santa : Kyunki tujhe agar ek forward karna ho to dusra tere paas rahe !!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A sardar on an interview for the post of detective was asked a question -

Interviewer - Who killed Gandhiji ?

Sardar - Thanks for giving me the job, I will investigate.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Once a sardar was looking at a WANTED poster & was wondering -

Saala wanted tha to photo kheenchne ke baad use jaane kyon diya ?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A drunk SANTA fails from 3rd floor. People gather around & ask: "SANTA ji ki hoya?" He said"pata

nahin main v hune aya haan"!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

SANTA : car me battery lagwane gaya, Mechanic ne poocha "EXIDE" ki lagaun?
SANTA bole: yaar, bar-bar kaun ayega DONO SIDE KI LAGADE!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

SANTA going with his sister, Some shouts "Oye, ,mashoka le ker kahan nikle"
SANTA gets furious & slap him & says" Oye. mashoka hogi tero. Meri to behan hai"!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jab SANTA sey poocha giyaa key aap ko maar(kutt) kyon perii...
Tu SANTA boley... Main Bus main thaa key meri jaib sey photo girr peraa... Main ney saath waali

khaatonn sey kaha.............. 'Madam saari upar karo mujey foto lena hai'!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

PARITO: Dekho na, wo aadmi mujhe kab se ghoor ghoor ke dekh raha hai. SANTA : Are woh to Kabaadi

hai, raddi aur bekaar maal par nazar rakhne ki use aadat hai!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sardar Ji calls Air India.
"How long does it take to fly to Amritsar?"
"Just a sec," says the rep.
Thank you." says the Sardar ji and hangs up.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sardar is driving a jeep in jungle.
Tourist: If lion comes very close to us then how we can escape?
Sardar: Give right indicator and turn left.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Flash news: A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard in Punjab.
Local sardars have so far found 500 bodies and are still digging for more..



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When Santa & his wife filed an application for divorce, the Judge asked: "How will you divide,

you have 3 children?"
Pat came Santa's reply: "Ok! We'll apply NEXT YEAR."



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Santa was filling up an application form for a job. He was not sure as to what was to be filled

in the column "Salary Expected".
After much thought he wrote : Yes!



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Santa gets ready, wears his tie and coat; goes out, climbs a tree and sits on the branch

regularly.
Banta asks why he does this.
Santa: "I've been promoted as branch manager."



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense.
Santa: The future tense is "You will go to jail".



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Santa recently found the answer to the most difficult question ever.
What came first, the Chicken or the Egg?
O Yaar, what ever u order first will come first.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Santa - "why are all these people running?" Banta - "This is a race, the winner will get the

cup." Santa - "If only the winner will get the cup, why are the others running?"



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


A Sardar went to a bank to open a S.B. A/C. After Seeing he went to Delhi. Guess why?
The FORM said "FILL UP IN CAPITAL ".



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Santa proposed to a girl......
Girl said: 'I'm 1 yr elder to you'.
Santa said: 'Oye, no problem Soniye, I'll marry you next year.

Thanks....



Sharad.........
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