a woman visited a hospital...
the doctor...
after an examination...
sighed...
and said...
i've some bad news...
you have cancer...
so you'd best put your affairs in order...
the woman was shocked...
but managed to compose herself...
walked into the waiting room...
where her daughter had been waiting...
well sweetness...
we women celebrate when things are good...
we celebrate when things don't go well...
in this case...
things aren't well...
i have cancer...
let's head to the club and have a martini...
after 3 or 4 martinis...
the two were feeling a little less somber...
there were some laughs and more martinis...
they were eventually approached...
by some of the woman's old friends...
who were curious...
as to what the two were celebrating...
the woman told her friends...
they were drinking to her impending end...
i have been diagnosed with aids...
the friends gave the woman their condolences...
and they had a couple of more martinis...
after the friends left...
the woman's daughter leaned over...
and whispered...
mom...
i thought you said you were dying of cancer...
and you just told your friends...
you were dying of aids...
the woman said...
ya...
i don't want any of those bitc*hes...
sleeping with your father after i'm gone...

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