God doesn't work that way

There was a boy who prayed to God everyday wishing that he would get a bicycle for 3 years.The third year,he went out to the town and on his way to the town,he saw a bicycle.He straight away stole the bicycle.The next day,his friend asked him where did he get the bicycle from.Then his answer,
"Yesterday,i realized that God does not work like what we thought so,i stole the bicycle and prayed for forgiveness."

Here is another one

A journalist was told to make a report about a murder case.The company where he was working with provided him all the transportation.
Near the place where the murder occured, he saw a crowd.After asking a few question from the neighbours as well as the victim's family,he still felt unsatisfied.Then,he saw a friendly and a familiar face.
After approaching him,he asked a few question:

Journalist:"Are you the victim's neighbour?"
The man:"No,i'm not."

Journalist:"Then,you must be the victim's family member."
The man:"No,i'm not."

Journalist:"Then what is your connection with the victim?"
The man:"Nothing at all."

Journalist:"Then why are you here?"
The man:"Because i am the driver that drove you here."

Another one

A small snake asked its mom:"Mom are we poisonous snake?"
Snake's mom:"Yes,indeed we are.If there is anyone trying to disturb you just bite them.They will die because of our poison.
Small snake:"Then what should i do if i bite my own tongue?"

There was one child,he never passed his math test before.Then one day,he has to go for another test.
Test result has been given back,this time,he ran to his mother and said:
"See this mom,i get a hundred for my math test."
"What was your test about?"
"It was about multiplication."
"Then what was the question about?"
"It was about the multiplication of 9."he continued"The question was:
9x1=
9x2=
9x3=
9x4=
9x5=
9x6=
9x7=
9x8=
9x9=
9x10=
so, i had no idea at all about the question but then i tried to make an effort so i wrote down what i knew:
0 then,i wrote another one 9
1 8
2 7
3 6
4 5
5 4
6 3
7 2
8 1
9 0
"??"